Human Resources 101

Entries Tagged as 'Humour'

Quote

January 2nd, 2007 · No Comments

“Yesterday I was a dog. Today I’m a dog. Tomorrow I’ll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There’s so little hope for advancement.” —Snoopy (Charles M. Schulz)

Tags: Careers · Development · Human Resources Management · Humour

The Toughest Performance Review

December 21st, 2006 · No Comments

He’s been doing the job for centuries. He handles an ever increasing demand for his services. The time window for delivering his product is the smallest you could imagine. Yet he consistently meets the expectations of clients, with only those on the naughty list less than happy with his performance.
How do you review someone who so [...]

Tags: Humour · Performance Management

Expired Human Resources

December 7th, 2006 · No Comments

(click for full-size image)

Tags: Humour

Quote

December 2nd, 2006 · No Comments

Doug Larson
“Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties.”

Tags: Humour

Steer well clear of all meetings …

October 19th, 2006 · No Comments

Guy Browning offers 20 top tips for surviving life in the workplace Guy Browning offers 20 top tips for surviving life in the workplace. Number 6 is great.
Get up to speed with the jargon
What differentiates a business thought from a normal thought is that business thoughts have a “going forward” at the end of [...]

Tags: Humour · Leadership · Links · Management · Motivation · Performance Management · Workstyle

Cover Letters from Hell

October 12th, 2006 · No Comments

We just finished recruiting for a new receptionist. While the cover letters we received lacked much of the verbiage that seems to come with resumes for more advanced positions, there were a good supply of spelling and grammatical errors. The best cover letter of the bunch was the one addressed to a different recruiter in another company. Her “I [...]

Tags: Humour · Recruiting

Totally Off The Record

August 25th, 2006 · No Comments

Totally Off The Record is the place for telling anonymous work stories.
It’s a virtual water cooler where people doing the same jobs as you come to share, and share in, the Outrageous, Too Funny, Embarrassing and Feel Good stories (and for some jobs Celebrities) that happen to us all while at work.
We’ve all had things [...]

Tags: Human Resources Management · Humour · Links · Workstyle

Office Gags

August 11th, 2006 · No Comments

I’ve posted a number of these suggestions around before. Now they have a point value. The object is to try and carry out enough of these gags to earn 15 points in a day. There are no prizes, just the satisfaction of a job well done.
One-Point Gags ——————————

Ignore the first five people who say ‘good [...]

Tags: Humour · Workstyle

How to Interpret a Job Ad

August 4th, 2006 · No Comments

“ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION”You’ll be making under $6 an hour.
“ENTRY-LEVEL POSITION IN AN UP-AND-COMING COMPANY”You’re paid under $6 an hour; we’ll be bankrupt in a year.
“AN UP-AND-COMING SOFTWARE COMPANY”There’s no chance on earth that we’ll be the next Microsoft.
“PROFIT-SHARING PLAN”Once it’s shared among the brass, you get what’s left.
“COMPETITIVE SALARY”We remain competitive by paying less than our [...]

Tags: Careers · Humour · Recruiting

How do you measure “bath” skills

July 24th, 2006 · No Comments

Is this a group skill at the warehouse or does only one employee need to know how to bathe? Wouldn’t it be more helpful if they could add and subtract?

via Ricky, who also found the neutering ad.

Tags: Humour · Recruiting